Its Bothering Me

Acho que te culpava a ti por nao dar certo, aliás eu culpava-te mesmo ! Not now, I blame myself cause now I know that wasn't your fault, but mine, for wanted something perfect that fast. Just to hear myself and nothing beyond that. If liked you in the beginnig, no. When I started ? I noticed that i didnt wanted to take my rings off. I overeacted I admit and I'm too proud to apoligize and if I knew that thats gonna change something I will, but it wont.

Somehow I lost my smile in that thursday when my eyes become aquariums. Somehow I didnt got angry, or sad or happy right away.. Then I saw you leaving .. "I'll never gonna get back to him again", not cause I didnt liked you but cause I didnt think that I was able to pass trough that whole pain again.Then the thing hit me. Somehow I don't blame you. Somehow the only thing that I want is to vanish of the center of the world for a while. Some one told me that I deserved way better, but we dont get to pick what and who we love. If I though that suffered in those 2 weeks, I was way wrong.. In comparisson to now. I really want to get over it, I really want to show you that, but thats not even a bit of who I am and what I feel in this moment. I don't even now how am I gonna do that, if every single person asks me the same thing every single morning. The bad thing is that when you like someone you try to be with that someone, but you cant. You do everything to keep the distance and if you try to get closer one more time think in the pain that you're gonna feel when you leave. Its worse..

When I write I know exactly how its gonna be, the beginnig and the end, Not in this one though, I just wrote every piece of shit that came up to my mind, every piece thats bothering me.